Difference between Loneliness and Aloneness

Loneliness and being alone is confused so often.  When someone is sitting alone that does not necessarily imply that they are feeling lonely.

Loneliness is a strong emotion that takes over you. It sucks out the happiness and engulfs you with anguish. There is a feeling of emptiness.  This feeling blinds us and all that we can see is darkness. We start believing that there is nothing more in life. It’s just a barren road complemented with hardships. Oh! That feeling is so overwhelming. It’s so difficult to live with that. Most people believe that one is lonely when that person does not have friends or when he/she is alone. However, this is not true. Loneliness has nothing to do with number of friends or people around you. I remember telling my friend that even though I am surrounded my so many people I feel alone. During that time I didn’t know the difference between lonely and alone.  

This emotion is so frightening most people try to find an escape from it.  Some people resort to alcohol, some to smoking, some to clubbing, some to books , some to religious activities. We are always trying to run away from it by distracting ourselves with activities. We seldom look at it or understand it. Running away from it only bring temporary respite and it will soon catch up. I believe the only way to overcome it is to understand it and look at it without any filters.

If we look at it properly we realize that we ourselves are the reason behind our agony. We are constantly depended on something external to make us happy. Be it friends, family, entertainment or God. When the source is snatched away from us we find it difficult to be happy own our own. We feel empty inside and lose the will to live. Start distancing ourselves from others slowly shrinking in to self loath and pity.

Being alone is a beautiful feeling of empowerment. It is like that ray of light that brings clarity in life by removing the darkness caused by loneliness. It makes us realize that to be content and happy we do not require any external source. Here alone does not mean isolation from people it means being free of fear. Being free of the constant wandering of the mind. When one is preoccupied with thoughts one is never truly alone. We are distracted by the memories of the past and the concerns of the future. Fear and preoccupation restricts us from observing the world around us. Restricts us from understanding the world around us. To be truly alone is extremely difficult but equally important. Being alone allows us to be sensitive toward other forms of life and fellow beings. Be become aware of  ourselves and our happiness. The consent and approval of others is no longer important to us. There is no pressure to fit in any particular group. There is realization that we are neither divided nor grouped.

I think the  best way to end this post is by writing  one my favorite  quotes

“If you want to be strong learn to enjoy being alone” – Buddha